Spot no. 6.
Two centuries ago, a jealous witch, cursed me, condemning me to the shadows.
Why do you have ladies underwear in your face?
Never mind that.
Who the hell is this?
I'm a vampire.
Sorry, he's English.
You may strategically place your wonderful lips upon my posterior and kiss it repeatedly! Ooh!
Love me! Never, harlot of the devil.
It was a regrettable turn of events.